Me and my Shadow...

I'm so surprised to find this is letting me post. I'm just going to toss up a short one tonight and then we'll see what happens next.

I think 2020 hit us all right up side the head. It was also hard on our hearts. Between the loss of many of our constitutional and God given rights, the serious risks of illness, the loss of family and friends from deaths that were unexpected, and the convoluted problems of the primary and the general elections, we were left spinning, mentally and emotionally.

Much of what I have been doing has kept me occupied with trying to figure out just what happened at that time.

I hope you are enjoying the photo of my friend. :-) I discovered him lurking in the table one night and managed to get a snapshot to show that he did exist. I'm not sure if he's a figment of artificial intelligence, my imagination, or an alien manifesting by some unusual technology. 😎

The little cabin still shelters me and keeps me content and warm. A few neighbors have moved in or out, but it's still a good neighborhood. The flowers have to defend themselves now as it's hard for me to get out and tend to them. It's actually gotten difficult to get around much at all, but I'm okay and still getting by with a lot of help from my family and friends. I'm very blessed with them.

Minimus, AKA Minnie mouse, the cat just didn't come home one day a couple years ago. She is missed, but the chores that went with her are not.

 I've grown to appreciate the solitude and peacefulness, but it was kind of fun the night the alien showed up. I don't see much of my shadow anymore, and I can't tap dance to the song any longer. 

It sent me to thinking about how far our love reaches when we share it with others. A very small kindness can travel a long way when the light is behind it, like a shadow.

Doing one good day today is good for your heart. And then trust the light to make sure it travels where it needs to be.

It's also good to find a smile in your day! Finding out that I can still post here made me smile.

Hopefully, I'll be back sooner than last time. 4 years is a little long between posts. God bless all of you!

What are we doing here?

Stay with me through this first part.

Our creator, who is some place, even if we aren't sure where it is, hallowed, holy, and blessed be whichever name you are known by to each one that knows you.

May your kingdom come and your will be done on Earth -- as it is done wherever you exist.

Please give us our bread for today and feed our spirits with your Love.

Forgive our mistakes and our outright hurtful behaviors, and help us learn to forgive ourselves, as well as those who have hurt us with their mistakes and errors. Help us learn to do better.

Don't let us be led into temptation, but protect us and guide us away from evil.

All of creation is yours. All of the power is yours. All of the glory is yours, forever and ever.

So be it!

†xxx†

Matthew 6: 9 - 13

Our Father which art in heaven, hallowed be thy name.

Thy kingdom come, thy will be done, on Earth as it is in heaven.

Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.

Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil, for thine is the kingdom, the power, and the glory forever and ever.
Amen.

†xxx†

Matthew 6: 10

"Thy kingdom come, thy will be done, in Earth as it is in heaven."

It came to me one day, that we were doing more than praying when we say these words. We are asking a favor; Making a request of the Divine love.

May your kingdom come and your will be done on Earth -- as it is done wherever you exist.

And I wondered, how is this supposed to happen? Were we expecting him to just,        - Poof!-  make it so?

I realized that where even one stands who hears the Divine voice, and who walks as their heart is guided by the Divine love, they are creating and holding a piece of his kingdom here on Earth.

May your kingdom come and your will be done on Earth --  is a request.

For his kingdom to come here, he needs occupants. He needs us to participate with him. He needs leaders, he needs people to care about others, she (intentional, he, she, holy Spirit, genderless is my view of the Divine loving being ) people of wisdom, she needs women of thrifty ways, children filled with the spirit of joy, people of song and music and so many others and their talents. It's a kingdom, a place where we all live under glory and joy in love. It is a place where we have peace in our hearts and in our lives.

It has no boundaries, it has no geographical location, it lives only as long as we create it in our lives. And it grows as others join us.

It is not just one book and it is not just one way of believing. Anyone who believes in a loving Divine being, and believes that you do unto others as you wish they would do unto you, lovingly, is a member of that same kingdom.

You will know one another by the fruits of your spirits. Those that are creating harm and pain are not walking with the loving Divine being that I know is real.

Even those of the kingdom can hurt each other and cause pain, but it's normally unintentional. (I have many discussions with him about design flaws...)

A part of his Joy in being with us, is taking each thing we do and making it work for more love. You are his and when you know it, you understand that he is always with you. He knows your heart and that you are doing your best, even when you feel it's not your best.

I have had proof that even when I intentionally am trying to be bad, he will turn it around and make it good. I have seen it with my own eyes.

Here, in this world on this planet, I will say walk where your heart leads you. Walk in the truth of yourself and your beliefs. The Love is always with you.

You cannot do one thing to make the Divine loving being love you less, and you cannot do anything to make him love you more. Exactly the way you are walking, exactly the way you are living, if your heart is his, you are doing what he needs you to do here for his kingdom come on our Earth.

You are creating a piece of his kingdom here by the way you live your life, loving God.

When you have a decision to make the only real question is, "What is most loving for everyone involved?" The smartest way to find the answer, that I know of, is ask him in prayer first.

When I pray, I use the Lord's prayer in my own words and now I add, how may I help you? How can I resolve this situation? How can I help this person? Why should I try if nobody else cares? Whatever is on my heart, even writing this today, I asked, are these the words you want out there?

The Divine loving being reminds me, "Then be still".

Listen for the answer in your heart. To have a conversation with God, you have to give him a turn to speak. I had my answer. If I can, I should. It's up to him what he does with it. That's the Grace from walking with the Divine loving, living being. I do what I can, but he reminds me he can do anything.

If you can do something you feel is loving, you do it. If he asks you to do something, you do it. Then he does what is needed with it.

If you look up and say, "How may I help you?", you may find yourself in over your head very quickly. The Divine love is not slow to answer you.

Then comes the hard part. He's chosen you to help him on Earth. He has given you a conviction and a mission. You will quickly find it becoming difficult.

I'm on a mission from God. It has had no definition. I just know it's so. Where I see his kingdom becoming, I add my help as best I can.

I think all of Matthew 6, for those of you who use the Bible, would be a good chapter for you today.

America, God shed his grace on the and crown thy good with brotherhood, from sea to shining sea. And may that Grace spread worldwide.

If you are working for his kingdom to come here on Earth, the words I have for you today are, "Stand your ground".

Wherever a believer stands is God's kingdom becoming on Earth. Stand God's ground!

Fearless Living?

Nothing major to post today. Just curious at how we KNOW that something is a problem for us and continue to avoid instigating the solution. For a fear of the dark we put up a night light, no problem. But many other fears could be comforted as easily and we deal with the fear rather than correcting the situation. It mystifies me.

When the correction is applied, the fear is gone, the stress is off, we rest better, smile more and our bodies go off  the "yellow alert" that they have lived under. So WHY don't we get off our butts and take care of it when it is first an issue, instead of waiting until we are half nuts from coping?

Humans. Are we really that lazy or do we somehow think we deserve our fears? I know that not all fears are as easily dealt with as plugging in a night light. It may take more effort or finances than we have to correct what we fear. Maybe you can't comfort all fears, but the ones you can create a fix for can be OUT of your life.

If you are living with a fear, and can figure out what it would take to stop it, then do it! Put the safe guards in place and RELAX!

When you feel the relief from stress that a release from fear provides, I think you will be glad you took the time to take the fear out of your life. Don't let it control you. Get it under your control.

Thank you

I survived, and actually ended up having fun, doing the interview with Rudi Rudinski for NDEspace.org on the Carribean Radio Show through BlogTalk Radio. Dottie Clark was a great help to me with her friendly encouragement. Dr. Richardson is going through a rough time right now and took the time to put on the show for us. It took a lot of people, their talents and time to make it happen.

The link in the post below will let you listen to it, if you are interested. We covered a lot of topics. Rudi made it easy to find my  thoughts and express them...

You really can't know why things happen as they do. This was originally scheduled for the 12th and got moved to the 19th...I sent an email out to those I thought might be interested in listening. One of my email friends that had read the book earlier wrote me to say he had intended to "go home" (via suicide) that day, but stayed to hear our talk...and has now decided to stay on longer here.

To be rescheduled meant I had to be nervous a week more. :) It didn't seem like a good thing to me. It meant something different to my email friend. He saw it as a reason to stay; to hear our words on the THAT date. That we cared he stayed lifted his spirit.

To know that even ONE person was helped by us in doing that show made it so very worthwhile to me...and all I did was talk...share words...

When we care and share we can change life for the better for each other. I might never had known how important it was to that friend, but he is here today and I am glad!

It took all those people in so many different locations on this planet to put those words out there and we helped one find the strength to keep living and loving...Go Team!!

First Radio Interview

I will be interviewed about my experience with dying and death tomorrow night, Monday, December 19th at 11:00 pm. You can listen live here:
http://www.blogtalkradio.com/caribbeanradioshow/2011/12/20/near-death-experience-the-mystery-of-suicide-death

Call in numbers for questions are 347 202 0222 or 661 467 2407.

You can read about my experience at http://www.1way2see.com/thebook.html

This is a first for me. I have done private interviews and one for Discovery Channel that was not used...I'm curious to see just how it goes.

The other point....

We make much of the death of Jesus, it was such a horrible ordeal and he did suffer terribly. Many here still suffer horrible, painful deaths. We seem to forget that the point of the story is that He did NOT "die" - He continued to LIVE.

It is not (to me) his death that changes each heart, not that He died for us, but His living love for us. He loved us enough that HE CAME BACK for us to SHOW that He lived on and that WE will live, too.

It is His living presence in our lives, his willingness to love us as we are, even as we continue to ignore, reject or disbelieve in Him, that gives us proof of His Divine Love; And it is his return that proved to us the reality of Eternity.

While He was alive, as we know alive, He changed hearts, healed and taught - and He is STILL Alive, doing the same.

Death doesn't count any more...not for Him and not for us. It's just a stepping stone to another way to live and love...People don't seem to see that. Jesus, by living beyond the death of His body, has opened up Eternity to each of us.

Even though His body here was killed, He lives, loving us still, and He SHOWS us that...proving His love to each of us here as we reach for it, and giving comfort to each heart that loses a loved one, that we will be with them again forever - where death can never separate us again.

Old Habits are Hard to Break

Each of us has our own ways of living and doing things that, over time, become habitual. It may be as simple as the way we walk to town or as complicated as an addiction.

I know that each of us is needed here, exactly as we are, for the completion of the divine and loving plan for all. Even those that a general vote would find as failures, mean, addicts, or another "negative" way of living, are needed here - I don't always know why something that may seem wrong to so many is truely right for another. I know that it is.

Learning to accept each other "unconditionally" takes something that one finds objectionable to learn on. You can't "learn" to love unconditionally if every thing is perfect between everyone...we would already know how...

What we seem to need to keep the closest eye on is our hearts...All we can really do is the best we can do. The only person we can change here is our self.

How we treat others and our selves shows to everyone we meet. We can't help it, the truth of us comes out through our words and actions...and what others see IS what they get.

You can keep a smile pasted on your face and say, "I'm just fine." for quite a while. But some where, it's going to slip off. The truth of how you really feel is aching for someone who really cares to hear it and offer comfort...

That's what we can do for each other here, listen and care, really care, how our hearts feel...for that is where the truth of you is...in your heart.

Matthew 15:17 - Do not ye yet understand, that whatsoever entereth in at the mouth goeth into the belly, and is cast out into the draught?

Matthew 15:18 - But those things which proceed out of the mouth come forth from the heart; and they defile the man. For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies: These are the things which defile a man: but to eat with unwashen hands defileth not a man.

These verses remind me to look at what is inside a person and to consider why they appear to me the way they do. What thing in life has driven them to be the way they are? Why does it matter so much to me that they "change"?

Often, if I answer those questions honestly, I find that I believe the way I live is "better", "easier" or more "right" than the way they chose to be...

Which one of us can claim to understand all of life and why it is as it is? I'm thinking the answer to that is, "Not one." I have to understand that, for them, their way is right - no matter what I might think. And it is OKAY that their way is different than mine.

When your heart is full of hurts and pain, betrayals and losses, how can you feel content or happy here? When you hate yourself, how can you care for or be kind to anyone else?

Helping each other get our hearts emptied of hurtful things and filled with hope and comfort is what we do when we treat each other kindly and with respect. To truely change a heart takes the Divine Love to act on it.

All we can do as humans is to be as gentle as we can on the hearts around us. They are what they are. People have "bad" habits and "bad" ways of acting - but each one of us has a heart that is just aching to love and be loved...just the way they are...

To be careful what comes out of your heart, you have to be careful what you allow to stay in it. Try to remember your hurts and hard feelings will keep coming out until you forgive those involved and set yourself free to be caring and open again...

Don't let the looks, habits or even actions of others change how YOU treat them...offer respect and kindness to each one. Care enough to help who ever is brought to your attention as best you think you can. You may not change their heart, but you CAN change yours...Having even one person treat you fairly, honestly and with loving care can give hope to the hardest heart when it meets one who really cares.

Considering that it's only three words, it sometimes seems like the hardest thing to do, but it's the only thing that counts; Love one another.

See no Evil

It's said God can't see evil...when I started looking it up I found a verse:

Zep 3:15 The LORD hath taken away thy judgments, he hath cast out thine enemy: the king of Israel, [even] the LORD, [is] in the midst of thee: thou shalt not see evil any more

The thought I want to share is this; God says thou shalt not see evil, should I keep seeing it?

What if I just give up the the word "bad"? What if I refuse to say anyone has done "evil"? If I leave it all to Him, I do not need to define bad or evil or sin - I only need to walk my steps in kindness and caring to those he brings me without judging if they "are worth" the effort, the care I offer...I can just offer to help if I can....and let Him cover what I can't see anymore.

It frees me. I only need to know if I CAN meet the need that is brought to me. I don't have to decide if I SHOULD meet the need.

And if it's not mine to do, I won't have what is needed. Either my heart won't be able to care enough to meet the need, or even if it DOES care and want to meet the need, I may not have what it takes to fill the gap...I will have to say that I can't help. They will have to seek elsewhere.

But I will not have called them worthless, sinful, bad, or whatever. I can just treat them like the hurting humans I see them as and do what I can for each one I meet. They don't have to "be worthy" of a kindness, any more than I am worthy of God's grace... I just have to do His will - and that is no mystery to me. His will is that we love, care, heal, help, encourage and even carry one another - that is what His son said and did.

1Jo 4:12 No man hath seen God at any time. If we love one another, God dwelleth in us, and his love is perfected in us.

If I want someone to be able to see there is a loving God then first I have to show them a loving human...that's not easy. I'm not God. But the life force in me is His. The love in me is His. I am of God. And I chose to walk the world lovingly.

If they can find one human who loves and cares, maybe they can reach to believe in a God that loves and cares.

I want to be like that. I want to love. I can't love all of everyone and thing here - but I will continue to do the best I can to be gentle with all those I meet. If even one looks up and finds the reality of the Creator, I can feel like being here was worth the walk. If something I can do eases even one heart for one day, it was a day worth getting through.

You don't have to be a saint. You only have to care.

Reminder Reprised

Sometimes I need to remember what works for me doesn't work for others. You will all make your own choices and have your own beliefs. They are all valid. To be true to my heart and my ideals I have to live my beliefs...below are some things from a couple pages I've written to remind me that we all can only be what we are...even me.

"When others don't understand why I care so deeply and give so much, I will not do less to suit their view of life. I will not care less to "match" their level of love. I will keep sharing my love so there is more love in the world. I want to show them that even broken and sad hearts can learn to love and trust again and that caring for each other is caring for ourselves."

"Striking out when we hurt is built into the body as a defense mechanisim. It shouldn't to be built into our hearts. I will forgive the hurt I feel and return loving attention and care. I don't find it easy. Prayer helps me to understand.

If we can look at the hurt done to us we will realize that, in many cases, it is our own sense of importance and social pride that is hurting. Is that really worth losing a friend over?"

"I will try not to return tit for tat. I'm just not going to get into a lose-lose situation again if I can help it. You do what you need to do - I will answer when you call, return your calls, come when you need me, share what I have and try to give what you ask me for. I will continue to help where I can, to fill the needs I see around me....I will try to soothe hurts, ease hearts, offer caring attention....even if that is NOT what you have shared with me.

Why?

Because I believe we are all in this together - we are ONE - each a part of the whole. If I hurt you I am hurting myself. I want to love myself. I want to love all of myself. That means loving you, too. "

I don't have to love what you do, I just have to love you the way you are. I can do that, most of the time, and with most people. It's just more of an exercise of the heart with some than with others. I work on it as it is brought to my attention.

"The book doesn't say 'do unto others AS they do unto you', it says to do what you WISH they would do for you.

I wish to be loved. To be forgiven when I hurt another. To have help when I need it. To have food when I am hungry. To have companionship when I am lonely. To have what I need when it's needed. I wish to be loved by others and to love them freely. I try to give that to all I meet.

I can't do that and hold on to the hurts done to me. I am letting go of the hurts and only counting the love. I will count the smallest sign of loving care and watch as those small, loving actions increase. I believe Love is all there is. Why would I try to track and remember things that are "notlove"?"

"If you encourage the smallest kindness of others and offer only kindness, it will change the world."

"Maybe I won't be able to live up to the ideal every day. I'm human. I can get vengeful and vindictive and want to hurt someone back....but if I can slow down even one minute and think about it, I can let the hurt flow over me instead of through me. I am slowing notlove and encouraging Love....I gotta try.

So do unto others as you WISH others would do unto you - feed them, house them, hold them while they cry, laugh with them, and love them.

Forgive them for being humans, love them for being part of your life forever."

I can't be what I am not. I care. Each of you has to do what is right for you, believe or not believe, care or not care, love or not love, share or not share, give or not give, take all you can get or give all you can spare. Your choice.

Mine is to love, to forgive, to smile, to care, to share and to enjoy what has been gifted to me. I'm a human female. I love things human, I love as a female. I will keep reaching for love here, enjoying parties and music, writing, riding, and all that brings smiles and joy to my heart. Joy is a gift of the spirit.

Last night I sat with the last of the family who cleaned up after a party. We sat in the dark, under a tent at a picnic table. As I tried again to describe the Divine Loving Being I met to one of them, I put my hand up and arched it across the horizon to try and show the size of that being. As my hand moved across our view of the sky, a falling star followed my fingers. It was seen by them and we all got a major rush off it....it was real in their world, not just mine.

The Divine Love knows how to show each of you that it is real. Last night it showed some of my family it was listening and caring about them...

Call it coincidence, if you must. It might make it easier for you to believe that I just happened to move my hand across the part of the sky we could see under the edge of a tent and a star just happened to fall the same way my hand was moving....

To me, it is the Divine Love showing it is alive and well in our world. And if those around me can not deal with that, it's not up to me to change their minds or their hearts. He does that. I just watch in awe while He does.

I'm not trying to be a saint. I'm trying to be a good steward of resources given to me and a good neighbor to those I share the planet with. In my tiny contribution to the world we live in, I want to gift happiness, comfort and contentment to those I walk with.

It won't happen every day, unless I work toward it everyday. Today I had to remember not to dim my shine to fit other's view of the world. That's their choice, how they see it.

I see we shine when we love and care and are kind to each other. My family shines. My friends shine. I wanna shine, too!

Don't let the world's idea of how you should live be all that guides you, follow your heart. Love as YOU love. And remember to love as you WISH others would love you.

You ARE Okay

Genesis 1:
31 And God saw every thing that he had made, and, behold, [it was] very (completely) good.

Time is for humans. Where there is no time, all things are together at once. What He created on day one, is still happening for us, but He saw ALL that He had made - the whole of it to it's final form - as He made it to be. All of us, each one, is included in "it was VERY good."

There is no qualifier in this statement. It doesn't say "almost everyone" or "only the ones who believe I made them" ... it says EVERY thing. That means you and I. To me, that means Lucifer and the angels, too. He created it all.

Isa 45
7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these [things].

All that we decide is good or bad, kind or hurtful, evil or loving, was created of the Divine Love. Each of us was designed to be as we are for a reason. We are each here to fill a need in His creation of perfection. We can't mess it up.

There is not one thing we can do that cannot be undone by God. There is not one thing we can make strong enough that he can't knock it down.

There is not one person here, just the way they are today, that is not His beloved creation, His child. We are all His. We are all part of Him.

Proverbs 16
4 The LORD hath made all things for himself: yea, even the wicked for the day of evil

Even those things that we see as evil, are needed for creation to be "very good". Now that is a stumper for some. Love is good. Evil is bad. Ask anyone....

But sometimes what is most loving looks evil to the one receiving it. Having their home burn down Christmas Eve didn't look good to my niece and nephew in law with four kids. Ask them how they feel about it now, more than a year later....in a larger, better home with easier finances....and all healthy and here.

Sometimes what is evil looks very good...."free" candy or trinkets for the taking can seem more than tempting. And who is hurt by it?... But when the truth comes out, it's not good any more.

Appearances are deceptive. Good and Bad are relative to the person and society. They are how WE judge.

We can be harsh judges. "He's a drunk.", "She's on crack." Even when it's the truth about others, it is the intent to express a negative toward others that is not loving. "She had four kids by four men.", not, "She raised four children alone." He screws around on his wife."He doesn't feel loved enough". Not one of us is walking here with a clean heart that always loves everyone...not one. So who are we to judge them?

And He says it is all very good....

Isa 437 [Even] every one that is called by my name: for I have created him for my glory, I have formed (shaped) him; yea, I have made him.

I believe that the life spark and spirit of each of us is a part of God's own spirit. He created us to be "like" Him. He powered us with His life force. We are all needed here, just as we are to complete His very good creation...

You are not bad because you are addicted. You are not lost because you are a thief. Your actions have been unloving toward yourself and others. He knows that. He formed you.

I can't begin to state how completely you are loved and accepted, just as you are, as His perfect creation.

I have had to try again, the past several weeks, to share this with others, how I see it.

We need you to be the truth of who and what you are. I don't know why, I only know that truth and love are the essence of the Creator and are in each of us as our individual soul.

However you are today, you are perfectly you.

If you chose to be loving and to bring more love into being on this planet, good by me. If you chose to be hurtful and spread more not-love around, not good by me, BUT, I know it's good by HIM.

If you are needed to be loving, you will be shaped that way. If you are needed to be strong and angry, you will be shaped that way. Life itself will shape you.

He brings us into being out of Love, He brings us home in Love. What you are is needed here. If you want to change something, go for it....if you can't do it yourself, then consider establishing a connection to the Divine love....reach for it.

Proverbs 16
3 Commit (trust) thy works unto the LORD, and thy thoughts (intentions) shall be established (stood upright).

If you chose to walk in Love here, then do so. If you, in your deepest truth, want to change anything about yourself, the power is there. It is already yours if you but reach out to touch it.

I don't believe you need to be saved or changed unless you want it. You will be brought home to Love one day, however you are. We are all just doing the best we can in this life.

What I do believe is that no matter what YOU believe, no matter how you live, no matter your strength, weakness, ability to contribute in the eyes of humans or any other thing - it won't change the fact that you are LOVED and seen as PERFECT, just as you are.

What I think of you or what other humans think of you doesn't count in the long run. Only what YOU think of you and what HE thinks of you.

And I tell you He says "I have formed (shaped) him; yea, I have made him."

He says "[it was] very (completely) good"

You ARE okay. Be yourself. Find the truth of yourself and express it today. Others may have trouble dealing with it, He won't.

Be gentle with each other. Life is hard enough without more pain being added to it. Start by being gentle with yourself. Realize you can't be a crystal if you are granite or marble. You can't be a tree if you are a flower....you are what you are...and it is very good.